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Story Time: More adventures in lawn mowing

Posted on Tuesday, June 11, 2024 at 4:16 pm

By Lorry Myers

At a charity auction, I placed an unbeatable bid on a small chainsaw and came home happy about it. The next day, I charged that thing up and proceeded to whack away at my overgrown bushes. Soon, my little saw friend stopped working. I pulled leaves and twigs and roots and vines out of the chain, but then I pulled the chain off, too. After reading the manual four times, I knew.

I had to make a call.

I don’t easily call my handyman and ask for help, I try to resolve my problems first. When all else fails, and it typically does, I call my son, the man who fixes everything. Taylor is an all-around handyman who comes every time I call. He was here when I threw a breaker, changes my furnace filter, and comes when I clog my drain.

My handyman is pretty handy.

However, along with his services, he gives strict lectures about things I should know but don’t. Taylor goes on and on about dryer vents, garbage disposals, and weed killer. That, or electrical circuits, lawn mower blades, and stopped up chain saws.

Like I need to know any of that.

A week later, Taylor returned my chainsaw accompanied with warning words about closed toed shoes and a lesson in chain tightening. When he left, I put that chainsaw to use until, again, the chain became clogged. I tried to remember what my handyman told me but quickly realized I tuned it out. This time, I didn’t call but waited until Taylor stopped by before, again, sending my chainless chainsaw home with him to fix.

Taylor never brought it back.

I thought about this as I sat on my mower in the middle of my yard and reviewed this new situation. I knew I would have to get my handyman involved because I was at a loss. So, I sent Taylor a text that said something was wrong with my mower. I described how my yard appeared to be mowed in stripes and the mower just felt “off”.

“Do you have a flat tire?” Taylor quickly asked.

“I think the blade is clogged with cicadas or needs to be sharpened,” I typed back. “And I ran out of gas trying to make it better.”

“Mom” was the answer I got back.

For the complete column, see this  week’s edition of the Centralia Fireside Guard